LOVE WARS: Venus/Mars

Maja Lazić
February 1, 2023

LOVE WARS: Venus/Mars

Venus/Mars synastry aspects determine relationship needs, but they are not enough to start a relationship. ‘Stronger’ aspects are needed to provide context. These aspects are typically associated with sexual intimacy, but have nothing to do with emotional fulfillment. These aspects show how much we give and how much we get in a relationship.

Some couples with challenging aspects of these two planets are in a long-term relationship which is far from being pleasant and mutually satisfying. Mars and Venus move quickly and their transits are short. If there is a longer transit that activates love life, their aspects will show happenings in that area. If you do not have such natal aspects, synastry and transiting aspects will be very important for love life.

Venus without aspect to Mars lacks channel through which it shows relationship interest. If there are no major aspects, there are probably minor ones that can explain events. However, aspects with asteroids and Chiron are not indicators of beginning of a significant relationship! If Mars has no natal aspects, it shows a separate part of personality that is in rebellion phase. It does not understand rest of natal chart because it does not have adequate energetic communication.

That’s why transiting aspects will be important and we should take advantage of them! Planet without aspects is a life theme that we feel separated from or invest all in it constantly seeking attention. Natal Venus/Mars aspect will show better understanding in relationships, because we have ability to understand ourselves. In case natal Venus or Mars do not have aspects with other planets, focus is on channeling energy of house and sign it is in.

Venus sextile/trine Mars

Venus sextile/trine Mars transit is short lived and may not be felt or noticed. New energy of a very lively quality encourages joy and harmony. We can receive gifts from our partner, enjoy delicious food, beauty and music. Period of enjoyment will characterize relationships. If a person is not in a relationship, transit can activate their love life. Sometimes it is felt through friendship and excitement about potential opportunities.

Venus sextile/trine Mars in synastry is a good compatibility indicator. Sextile is more active while trine is more passive and not so visible if relationship does not exist for a long time. We have ability to satisfy love’s expectations. We can get what we want from our partner. He is ready to fulfill our wishes so we can have fun together. Partner instinctively and intuitively understands our behavior. Assertiveness in love leads to emotional satisfaction and dynamics that make relationship fresh and mutually fulfilling.

Venus inconjunct Mars

Venus inconjunct Mars transit shows desire to satisfy our needs in a dominant way. Other people may experience this as selfishness. What we like, someone important to us does not like. This creates disharmonious time in relationships. Partner may be dissatisfied with our behavior. Our desires do not match.

Transit can be characterized by short-term passion. In long run we don’t like same things. It’s as if we don’t recognize that our behavior cannot make us happy. There is a lot of friction with important people. For example, we want to go to the theater and our partner takes us camping. This further separates the couple. Transit will show whether they will survive or not, even if they have other good synastry factors.

Venus inconjunct Mars in natal chart shows that we are not able to judge when we should react and when be passive. Person is trying to prove something not being direct and focused on goals. From an early age, we have to learn how to make wishes come true and channel anger. Socially unacceptable behavior leads to not being aware of one’s value. We often behave inappropriately drawing negative attention.

At the same time, we cannot show initiative when something is important to us. We are not satisfied in relationship and does not know how to integrate that. When talking about inconjunction, it is important to determine is Venus or Mars stronger and their individual aspects. Venus is our great desire and Mars is action. We learn what we need to do in order to achieve it. If we have Nodes in aspect with one of planets, we usually learn great karmic lessons in love.

Venus square Mars

Venus square Mars transit expresses attraction and need to satisfy desires. We seek love in an assertive way. Person flirts or feels great excitement in meeting someone attractive to them. For those who are in a relationship, there is a need for partner to show attention and love all the time. Strong sexual needs are felt and possibility of adultery is strong if other factors contribute to it.

When in a new relationship, it may seem that partner is not there for us. Mars easily loses interest if it is not dynamic and interesting. Transit can refresh a commited relationship and bring passion. If there are problems, this aspect is expressed through arguments, break-ups and frustration. Physical expression through sport and movement is required. Anger alternates with tension of sexual excitement and passion.

Venus square Mars in natal chart shows someone who often thinks only of his/her needs. Because of selfish behavior problems in friendship and love life can appear. Love becomes hate. Relationships are challenged by unconscious behavior. Breakups followed by falling in love, going in and out of relationships quickly and dysfunctional flings are common, too. They attack instead of providing attention. They judge and demand what they cannot give. Arguments and frequent loss of patience cause big problems and relationships break down.

They expect environment to want the same as they do without understanding how to maintain relationships. They see other people’s different expectations as if partner is deliberately not providing what they want. Person feeds on drama and passionate excitement behaving absurdly and doing things that do not make sense. Environment has no understanding for such behavior. If we are not aware of natal Venus/Mars, problems will be seen in every relationship. We can give a lot when we integrate this aspect around Saturn’s first conjunction with one of planets. Over time, we can become devoted partners, but we can also create even bigger issues.

Venus conjunct Mars

Venus conjunct Mars transit describes strong sexual attraction. In long-term relationships we feel that over time there is no passion as it used to be. Transit could revive sexual desire. We easily get into relationships and enjoy love exchange. Partner is receptive to our needs. If he doesn’t try enough, we lose interest. Transit may bring parallel relationships or flirtation.

Attraction in friendship can lead to a relationship depending on sign/house and ruler position. Transit is more characteristic of beginning of short rather than long relationship. If one of planets is retrograde, it can bring an ex-partner. Sometimes this is love that comes and goes. Transit can help rekindle a relationship if it was on shaky ground.

Venus conjunct Mars in natal chart gives great sexual needs, magnetic attraction and passion. It is easy for us to go for what we want and make it happen. Person is not inclined to adapt to environment being used to getting every need met. They are motivated by strong desires and cannot be patient. They want everything now.

They like to flirt and want company and enjoyment. It is natural for them to expect that all their wishes will be fulfilled. Both genders can have a lot going on and experience many relationships. They will have a hard time accepting rejection or being disliked. Although we traditionally associate this aspect with love relationships, it is mainly about sexuality and attraction. It is usually not an indicator of a long relationship if there are no other factors to support it.

Venus opposition Mars

Venus opposition Mars in natal chart is a yin and yang story with selfish elements. We want a relationship, but we’re doing the opposite. Difficulties exist in relationships because we are not flexible. We are aggressive when it comes to our desires, but we do not respect other people’s wishes. Attractive men with this aspect are very problematic. They need someone who is very adaptable. They do not notice that others may have different needs.

Breakups are inevitable consequence of unconsciously hurting other people. They do not understand effect of their behavior. It is very possible that this behavior results from severe pain they experienced. Challenge could have been visible in parents’ relationship. Financial problems are possible, too. They spend too much, expecting more money in relation to quantity and quality of work they do. Magical attraction makes it difficult to maintain a relationship. It seems that everyone else is more interesting compared to the person they are with. Quantity is there, but quality is not.

Intimate relationship does not bring enough satisfaction. We enter into parallel relationships during marriage, but still have little enjoyment and happiness. Arguments and problems are solved through large amount of sexual energy that is always present. They think about themselves ignoring other people’s needs. This is a reflection of their inconsistent personality. Behavior is in conflict with needs due to insincerity (towards themselves). Deep connection is a struggle. They stay with someone motivated by gain and not love.

How is this aspect healed?

When they lose what they want, they are motivated to change. Relationships with them are always dramatic and passionate, like in a movie. Breakups are inevitable because they attract people with different qualities that reflect their suppressed personality part. Saturn’s transit can bring karmic love that will mark their life.

They are born with a karmic code that they got everything from one parent and not enough from the other. They must learn to balance that within themselves. Working on themself will also lead them towards better relationships. However, get used to the fact that they won’t remember to buy you a birthday present even though you took them to Maldives.

We only learn to love after our heart is broken. In a karmic sense, our heart gets broken as a result of all heartbreaks we put other people through in our love life. If we solve our emotional problems, we can be a wonderful partner. Until then, we choose those who will somehow be powerless to us.

One day we may wake up and realize that we were with the wrong person all along. We have spent our whole life in relationships having intense sex life, but true love was never there for us!

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